What really don't like about you

We may be friends for nine years.
I known you as a sweet and kind heartened young lady.
We fought but within minutes, we are laughing and playing again.
This relationship was built well enough for that to happen.
In time to come, when you mix with others, will your change destroy our friendship?
I know people change. I do change, of course, I grew up and learnt about how the world works. I change, for the better. That is why I am thankful that changes in people like Kelly did made it. She became a person I look up at now, a friend, a great one.
But look at you.
Just because you go to a new school, a new level, you get introduced to a new environment and new friends. When you make friends, it is okay. I am fine. But you changed? Changed in a.. I don't know what to say. Where was that kind-sweet-thoughtful you?

You always tell me that your friend treats you and others like dolls; tossing you aside when new and better ones are there. How about you? You treat me like that. You keep talking to my sister because of some actor who is already married and in his mid-30s. It is not that you can't talk to my sister, you can. But you left me with no one to talk to.
You have been giving faces to others. Oh. Oh. You are a grown up now, is it? Wow. How mature.
When stress attacks you and irritation take over you, you vent it out. Wow. Vent it in my face. When I was in Sec 1, did I do that to you? I hold it in. I vent it through writing on papers and dumping them away, throwing them away. I tell my mother about it, tell her that I was tired and hopefully she would understand that. I might have a face but I will always explain and I will never ever shout.

Argh. I don't know what to say anymore.

This post is angry, so it will end with:

GetOuttaMahFace

That little magic between best friends

Today, me and Kelly suddenly didn't felt like talking to each other. I was not really sure what happened. If I am not wrong, it was something about..
That...
That..
What was that- Ah. Yes. Something about going out. She was kind of angry-ish, irritated-ish, disappointed-ish or some-emotion-that-I-cannot-sense.
We did not talk. We did not go to for lunch together. I was actually planning another post but I changed it to this one. I nearly cried because I wrote that. But I threw that paper away. Why?
Well, after ERP Math Test, we were talking already- Okay. Let me get to my main point.
Let me do a comparision.
If you argued or quarreled with a classmate or schoolmate, would it take a short time to calm down? For me, it would take a day. Or two.
But when it comes to Kelly, it would be totally different. I can't explain this feeling. It is just like that.
Isn't it like magic?
All of a sudden, disappointment and anger is gone. As if someone took it away and gave her happiness. And gave me too.
Isn't it amazing?
It was quite natural. That is what best friends are for.
We laugh, play and go crazy together.
Quarrels? Arguments? On the spot, you would get angry and 'hate' each other. After a while, you would feel silly that you got so angry.

I am done with this short and sweet post ^^ Be happy with who you have. God gave them to you for a thousand reasons that you might not even know ^^ Have a great day!

Okthxbye

[Late: 12/08/2012] God bless me with the best dream I have always wanted.

So I guess my wish has came true. Yes. A dream. No Donghae? Yes, but I am still as happy to see the couple I ship be together. Let's not drag and start on the story.

I was in the ladies, washing my hands. Then I found out a little girl was with me. She was adorable. When she smiled, though she had one missing tooth, she looked sweet. I smiled at her. She was rather familiar. Have I seen her forever.
"姐姐~ " She pointed at the sink. I guessed she wanted to wash her hands. She sounded so sweet, who wouldn't help her? I smiled and nodded. I carried her small body up. She was laughing at her own reflection. I laughed with her. I put her down. But she held my hand.
She just pulled me and I followed. I don't know where I was going but I know this young girl would take me there. We were out of the ladies. A big crowd of people was in front of us. And that same boyfriend I had in the another dream, he is so hot,was waiting for me. I could only see his mouth and nose. If I could see his eyes, he would be perfect.
"Your friends are over there. They will be happy to see Rose. Let's go."
Rose? You mean Natalie's first daughter? No wonder she was familiar. My boyfriend carried her up on his shoulders. She was above everyone.
"Hey, guys."
"Hi, Sandy~~ Where's that irresponsible Ali? He left his child to you two. Doesn't mean you two are her god parents, he can do that." Wait, wait. What? I am- no, me and my boyfriend are her god parents? Yay us.
I just smiled.
"Aiya, it is their big day today. Groom also need time to style a bit." GROOM. WUT THE HECK. AND HE HAS A CHILD. PREMARITAL SEX AH? WAH. LIKE THAT.
"But still? Oh ya, Sandy. We need to help Ali with his 'guests'. Kelly will bring us there." Joy said. Then I saw Kelly. Beside. Her. Boyfriend. Who was.... Lee. Sung. Min.... - HOLY. OH MY GOSH. LEE SUNGMIN SIA- Wait, wait. Why me help that idiot? So I stared at Joy weirdly.
"Hey, I know you want to be with your gorgeous boyfriend but we are the bridesmaid. Remember?"
Mind blown. I am a bridesmaid.
Then three of us hooked arms. We went to a red table before the entrance of the ballroom where dinner will be.
"Hey, brother. Congrats~"
"Hey, Keeeeen. Ah. I see you have got the lady in your hands. Hi, Jasmine." I heard voices. He was shaking hands with Ken and Jas- OMG JASMINE WAS SO PIAO LIANG OMG-
"Hi. Congrats. So where is my Natalie? Did you kidnap her?"
"Oi. After today, she is officially mine. Hahaha. Just joking. She is in her make up room with Nadhirah. Sghe wouldn't let me in," Ali saw us, "Hey, Sandy. Bring Jasmine to Natalie."
Instead of me, Kelly was leading. For those moments as we walking with Jasmine, I felt a strong feminine side of her. Then a door opened.
"Natalie~"
We called in sync. Natalie turned and her face. Wow. SO PRETTTTYY. Her wedding dress showed the shape of her figure. I guess she was the only one who could bring the dress out well.
--
Suddenly, there was this skip. I don't know why and I didn't want it. But whatever. I found myself on stage where Natalie was talking, and Ali was quiet. "I want to thank my sisters who have been with me for so many years. I want to also thank them for going through tough times with me. Jasmine, being a motherly friend. Nadhirah, a shoulder that I can lay on. Joy, Kelly and Sandy, the sisters who made life fun and colourful. And the one will thank the most specially is Sandy," Why me? O.O,"the one who delivered my baby in my car when we couldn't get to the hospital in time." Everyone clapped. Ohmygod. So I did used those skills. Wow. Then I didn't waste my time remembering how to do so. And now I see why I am Rose's god mother. Then dinner started.
Don't worry.
I was eating vegetarian. My boyfriend too. Holy, my boyfriend is one too?
"Ahsiol, Kelly got boyfriend liao. Eh, you know hor, when we were in secondary school, Kelly masturbates. Hahahaha." Haqim joked. That earned him a slap in the shoulder from Kelly. Sungmin winced in pain as the smack was loud. Sungmin was damn cute. So I turned to my boyfriend and what the fook, still cannot see his face.
---
I am cutting short the rest. These are the information I have found out:

• Ken asked Jasmine to be his girlfriend and she said yes.
• According to Ken, Ali has seen Natalie's sexy figure. (Durh he did.)
• Natalie and Ali went to junior college together.
• Natalie kissed Ali when he wanted to talk further about their love story, which I assume that Natalie isn't ashamed to kiss a guy in front of everyone (No offense, Natalie.)
• Because of the earlier dream and if I relate these two together, the couple had a son because Rose wanted a younger brother.
• Ken want to have a baby with Jasmine. 
• My boyfriend kissed me but I didn't feel any kissing.

That is my information. And according to me, I don't think other dreams will continue from here. It was never more than two times. So I can say Natalie, Ali, Ken and Jasmine were lucky to be main in my dream and not in my dream. You get that sentence right?
Okay.
Hopefully, I can draw all the people which are inspired from my previous dream.
Yay. I should jia you. I got NataLi's done. I will do- Hahaha. I am not gonna reveal which couples imma draw.
Okthxbye

What to get me as presents

Since August is a busy month for many of us, most of my friends have not much time to get me presents. And in case you don't know what to get me, this is a list you might wanna read through.

1. Y Style shades/ Any sunglasses
I need sunglasses. Singapore is too hot, I need to protect my eyes from the bright and burning sun. Get me shades like this:

Isn't he sexy? 

If you can't get Y Style, get those in Cotton On. They are awesome

But please no pink, purple, no lens that are like mirrors. It is not that I hate them, they just don't suit my face.

2.Cups
I need my own cups. It would be great if they had awesome designs or words. You know comics connection? They have many of them. I wouldn't mind cute designs. I will accept them.

3.Socks
Yes! I need ankle socks. Or k-pop socks
The idols I want on my socks are:
Donghae
Eunhyuk
Siwon
Heechul
Taeyeon
Tiffany
Jessica
Yoona
T.O.P
-----
Any socks will do. I need my own socks too. Any design as long as you are willingly to give me. No white socks, I wear them to school.

4. Caps/Hats/Beanies or however you spell that
Yes. I want hats. I need them to match my clothes :D I look too plain without them. I have them but those are too small for my head. Okay, I have a big head but whatever. I have been searching for a type of hats which are like this:

The hats SuperJunior wore 

I like beanies too. Sandy like them because Donghae likes them too. No, they keep my hair neat. Donghae did ageyo when he wore a beanie so she really liked it a lot. Okay, fine.

I like black, pale grey and navy blue for beanies. If you want to get hats in the above examples, just have cool design like those monster hats. Get the biggest size. Like I have said, I do have a big head.

5. Baseball jackets

I know, why the hell would a Singaporean wear a freggin baseball jacket when it is so hot? They are cool, alright. No, she wants the one Super Junior and SoShi wore with their names on it. Shut up- Sorry for the self talk. But true. I have been saving up for it but I end up buying albums. I am still waiting for Kelly to get me my SFS* Ver. A and B. It is taking forever *slient cries* and now SPY is out... *CRIES MORE BUT SILENTLY* 

Anyway, I have been searching for the on Amber and Key wore before but... I can't. This is depressing. 

If you can't get baseball jackets, it's okay. I will not be angry. I will accept jackets but I need the right size. I wear either L, XL or XXL. I am big-boned, okay? Sorry.

6. Ear Rings

I want a particular size of ear rings. Let me find that sexy photo of Donghae for you guys.

*searching through files*

SHO CUTEEEEEEEE OMG BRB DYING

Oops. Not relevant. Wait. Got it.

Found it:

Please ignore the drama they are having and look at the ear ring

If not, any size will do. Or colour. But Please no 'cute' designs and lame designs. Please hor. I will cry if you get me those. Simple ones will do. If they are nice and I can wear them to school, trust me, those ear rings will never leave my ears except for special occasions. Be lucky. So choose wisely.

7. Phone cases/straps/accessories

I do not use the Apple brand. For your information, I use Samsung Galaxy S2. I have been seraching for a dream catcher so that I can hang it on my phone. And I love phone cases. I have been saving a lot but it goes to my albums. So yeah.

8. Accessories for me

Yes. Rings, big ones please. I have big fingers. Necklaces, not too fancy. Bangles, yes, Cotton on ones would be perfect.  

Yes. We done with the list! No, she haven't add a few more. They are too ridiculous to be posted but trust me, she is shameless enough to post it below this paragraph.

Okay. Fine. Here you go.

Ridiculous#1: Life-sized board/poster of Donghae

I thought it could be true before of the drama Skip Beat. Gong Xi took it home and my jaw was hanging. I wanted to rob her but it was a drama. So ya. I know, it is impossible.

Ridiculous#2: Albums

I didn't add it in because they are expensive. I am saving up but I am dying. If you wanna know what albums I have been wanting, ask Kelly. She got the list. I feel shameless posting it here. No SFS*, I paid the money. I am just waiting for it. 

Ridiculous#3: A trip to Korea/Japan/Indonesia/Taiwan

These are the countries I have been wanting to go. Natalie, how about a trip to Indo and you'll be my tour guide? Shinyeong, bring the class along to Korea. Japan? Nobody will bring me there. This is depressing. I know I have been to Taiwan before but I love that country. The night market, food, beautiful places. Oh my god, specially the place that Hyuk and Wookie took a picture at. Oh my god. I was there. I love that place too and I wanna go there. But I can only go there next year...

-----------------

Okay. I am serious done. Yay. So go ahead, people. Get me a gift for my birthday. Don't worry, you have the end of August, I will accept your gifts. It is okay if you can't get what I like.  I will accept it. It will be with me. Remember, it is the sincerity that counts, not the price of the gift.

Please see; this list will be continuously updated so if you all don't know what to get for me each year. This post will always be here.

*SFS: Sexy Free and Single; I'm ready too, Bingo~~

Okthxbye

That Totoro smile; HappyBirthdayToTiffanyHwang

This is a quick post. I need a post on my beloved Tiffany unni ^^ And it is the start of the month. 1st of August, the birthday of this lady with many charms ^^

Thank you for being in SNSD, you inspire me ^^ 

Hwaiting!

Happy birthday! May dreams and wishes come true. Always be who you are ^^ Hehe ^^ Please come to Singapore for a fanmeeting :( I have been waiting. 

Tiffany Hwaiting!

SoShi hwaiting!

About my eyes

Today, when I was hanging out at that 7-11 which CQ, Stitch and me always go to, it came to me all of a sudden. So I ask again,
"Should I do an eye surgery?"
For those who don't know me or how my eyes are really like, I have this thing called 'Lazy eye'. Since young, I only use my left eye which is  your right. Due to this, I control both eyes at the same time. Now, my right eyeball stays at a corner of my eye.
Starting from Primary four, I was called names like 'cockeye'. It has been bothering me for that year. I soon ignored it. But still, people around me are so insensitive. Only those few like Gin, Tiffany, Corliss, Maeshen, CQ, Stitch and more, they quite understand me and this condition. How about the rest? I mean, I know they dont understand but at least.. You know.. Ask it in a polite way like 'Excuse me but can I know why your eyes are like this?' or 'May I know how your eyes become like this?' At least I wouldn't get a hit in the face, right?
From what I feel and see, this thing actually matters a lot to the people around me. The looks is the first impression. I don't feel really cared for as much as those better looking ones. I guess that is how they think: "Ah, Sandy has these eyes. I should find others", "I rather join the normal ones", "I should join them. They look cooler"
I don't know. Maybe I am wrong.
What makes me feel like this was that once when I sawTeuk at that 7-11, when I waved to him, he had a tao face. I mean, you know those strict faces? Yup. That face. He just walked pass me and left for the cashier. And when he got out, he was talking to his friends happily again. Maybe he is like this all the time? I don't know but this is the message I am receiving: you are not one of those girls, you are different
Hopefully it isn't.
Just hope.
But don't worry, Secondary school was bad. It was fine. Other than the occasional jokes made by those playful classmates, it was fine. Thanks, 2E2. Thanks a lot.
The surgery came to me because the previous visit to the clinic near my house, the doctor saw my eyes. He suggested an eye surgery. My parents, especially my dad who was strongly disagreeing, said no.
"It is so risky. How can we let you go? But as long as you are fine, it is up to you."
My dad is a protective guy. He loves us and doesn't want to lose us.
So I asked my classmates. No one gave a comment. I only got likes. But my wonderful Jasmine ^^ that sweet girl , she texted me about it. She asked why I had this eye problem. There was one message that really touched me.
You are who you are. People will accept. It's your choice. Is it dangerous for the opt?
Yes. We are who we are. Thanks ^^
But when those people tell us to be who we are, they judge us.

"No"
"Why?"
"I rather you be like this."

Thanks KELLYTANCQ XD  Thanks for loving me for who I am.
I maybe selfish but I want this kind of love, more of it. I may not feel it but, I just want that feeling. When you arlying around alone, people will approach you. When you are going to leave school, they ask if I wanna hang out with them. When you are silent, people want to talk with you. But I only witness these scenes.
I have been sighing this evening. I am tired. I feel tired, physically and mentally. I dont know what to do.
So guys, what if I go for an eye surgery? What will you guys do? And what if it fails and my right eye goes blind?
I need answers. Please do not hesitate if your views may hurt. I rather hear the ugly truth than those beautiful lies that are sweet to the ears. Can you all speak out to me? Please?
Thank you.
The ending for this post will be different.

God bless us all. And remember, no one is perfect; we are who we are; the only perfect people are fakers.

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